


Different Kinds of Beds

by heize (daehanmingyu)



Category: Wanna One (Band)
Genre: ?????, Alternate Universe, Angst, M/M, Suggestive Themes, fluff to smut to angst, idk - Freeform, idt its smut tbh, it gets more and more disappointing as it goes idk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-09
Updated: 2018-04-09
Packaged: 2019-04-20 17:04:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14265666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daehanmingyu/pseuds/heize
Summary: Jaehwan in different kinds of beds, from Seongwu's perspective.





	Different Kinds of Beds

**_A flower bed_**.

Seongwu would love to see Jaehwan running around in a flower bed. Tall cosmos flowers blooming all over the place as his lover giggled his obnoxious laughter which he grew to love. The younger would be holding his hands, and they would run and run and run, till wherever the flower bed ends. And they'll fall onto a patch of free freshly cut grass, Seongwu falling first then Jaehwan.

He imagined the two of them still giggling and laughing like maniacs, without a care of what was going on with the world, just the younger boy, without any judgmental glances, without any ugly grimaces.

Just him, with Jaehwan right there in his arms. 

Seongwu imagined how Jaehwan would look up at him and smile softly, and then he'll hide his face in the crook of his shoulder as he again giggled out loud. The two would be on the grass, under the sun, near the flowers, basking in each other's love, the only sound being the occasional swaying of the flowers in the flower bed because of the wind... and the beating of their hearts, as if in sync.

And they would share a kiss. Sweet, like the usual ones, Seongwu thought. But maybe he'd pictured it a bit more perfectly, like in the movies except better. And they will beam at each other and just spend the rest of the day saying cute things about each other. Talking about how cute his Jaehwan is, how cute their love is, how cute their children will grow up to become and how cute everything is as long as they're with each other.

 

 ** _A normal bed_**.

There's two types of imaginations for this one. _One_ , Seongwu would wake up with his cutie in his arms; or sometimes he'll be in the other's arms. Either ways his legs would be tangled up with Jaehwan's as the younger has his back facing him. His face would either be tucked against his shoulder or pressed behind his back. And then he'll place butterfly kisses all the way up to the younger's ear.

This is when Jaehwan would stir around in his sleep and whine, Seongwu thought. They will stay there, lying awake with eyes closed and smiling happily. A few minutes later Jaehwan would be under him, wrapping his legs around his boyfriend's as they made out.

It would be a great mess, the two of them breaking up to cringe at the thought of both of their morning breaths. But none would care further when Seongwu dips back down to capture Jaehwan's lips with his, the younger's hand at the front of his shirt as he fisted it. They'll break apart, breathless. Faces just inches apart, Seongwu added. Finally, they'll get off the bed, hand in hand as they clean each other up.

Well, truthfully speaking Seongwu is a very strange man with very wild thoughts. He'd always have tactical ways to get to Jaehwan. As in, arousing him. The _second way_ Seongwu wanted this to roll out is on their fifth anniversary. He and Jaehwan would be stumbling into their apartment, just tipsy enough for them to slurr and have blurred eye sight. Seongwu would have Jaehwan pressed up against their apartment door as soon as it's closed. They'll spend their time fumbling each other's zippers and removing some of their clothings off each other: socks, shoes, coats; leaving a trail of laundry to clean up the next day. For now, Seongwu thought, Jaehwan will be his sole focus.

Jaehwan would flop onto the bed they share, struggling more than usual to adjust himself to sit at the center of the bed with his legs slightly spread. His eyes would be half lidded as he tugged Seongwu closer to him by his necktie and their lips would meet in a dance of the tongues. Seongwu's hands would trail down familiar lines and curves, resting around his lover's hips by the time they pulled away from each other.

They would be left in their boxers by then. Seongwu would fish out their usuals: the lube and some condom that he prepared before their night out and they would do the devil's dance all night. Jaehwan would be underneath him, face contorted as he moaned Seongwu's name over and over again until his throat becomes so raw.

And then they would pass out, not caring if their juices dirtied the linen, nor worried about their sweaty and sticky bodies cuddled up in a pile under the sheets. Of course, a few minutes later Seongwu would groan and fetch some wipes back to at least clean the both of them before slipping back to sleep.The two would sleep soundly with satisfied smiles on their faces. Seongwu imagined them like that, a happy gay couple, just like every other couples out there.

 

But never had Seongwu ever imagined Jaehwan on **_a hospital bed_**.

It was on their fifth anniversary. Jaehwan was supposed to finish picking his gift and rush over to meet Seongwu. Seongwu offered to go pick him up since he got the car but Jaehwan said that his friend, Jisung can drive him to the restaurant and told him to stay put. So being the obedient boy, Seongwu stayed put.

Seconds became a minute. A minute became ten minutes. Ten minutes became half an hour. Half an hour became an hour. Since the tenth minute, Seongwu started to panic and called Jaehwan. To which he answered, telling him that he's already somewhere near the restaurant and he'll be right over so Seongwu should just wait. 

Seongwu waited. By the time he'd already been waiting for Jaehwan for twenty minutes. This man and his fashionably late ass, Seongwu thought to himself as he caught the hostess sending him insinuating looks. She probably thought his date ditched him. Seongwu hoped it wasn't true, swallowing the anxiety that suddenly rushed through his veins.

By the thirtieth minute, Jaehwan called to tell him he had to stop by this shop for a while and ended his call abruptly. From the tone of his voice, Seongwu felt an unnerving feeling in his midriff. But he didn't call back.

Around the fiftieth minute, Seongwu called Jaehwan but no one was there to pick up. He started panicking, fingers crossed in a plea so that nothing has happened to Jaehwan while he called Jisung. 

Jisung picked the phone up after a few rings. The call ended with Seongwu half screaming in an exasperated voice as Jisung tried to calm him down to no avail. Turns out Jaehwan declined Jisung's offer to give him a ride and decided to walk here all the way from this gift shop a few too many blocks away. He picked his coat up, leaving a few notes on the table for the glass of water he ordered before marching out of the restaurant.

Suddenly he felt helpless, out in the streets like this with no idea where Jaehwan was. He aimlessly ran, ran, ran and ran. Until he saw a commotion going on ahead and quickly ran towards it. In the middle of all the commotion was an ambulance, a few paramedics running around and bringing the patient onto the ambulance with a stretcher. 

Seongwu was in silent prayers, hoping that it wouldn't be the love of his life lying right there. But from the bouquet of flowers just a few meters in front of him, he felt like the situation is going to turn bad. It did. Because the person lying on the stretcher right now, was a lifeless Kim Jaehwan.

Seongwu's knees buckled as he dashed forward, tears welling up in his eyes as he felt his heart drop lower than the earth. His sobs stopped some people in their tracks as they turned to look at him. And just then he felt a debilitating pain in his head and _poof_!

 

... _Nothing_.

...

... ...

... ... ...

 

 _Beep_! Seongwu groggily opened his eyes, his hand immediately flying up to cup at his head as an excruciating pain hit him. He'd realized the tubes connected to his hand as he shot up, eyes darting everywhere before he struggled out of bed, running out into the corridor barefooted.

He shook every doctor he met on the way until he arrived at the front desk. He tried to still himself before asking about Jaehwan in a shaky voice, arms flailing around to gesticulate his description. He could tell the not-so-well-hidden grimace the nurse gave him as he mentioned their relationship as 'his boyfriend'. But she made quick work and found Jaehwan for him.

The boy laid in an ICU ward. The doctor had briefed him on the current situation which he only heard half and understood a quarter. Because Jaehwan was dashing in his mind and he was so fidgety from their anniversary hitting a snag that he wasn't able to concentrate on the doctor.

Jaehwan laid there, on the hospital bed. Next to him a lot of machines were in work, one of which he recognized as the medical monitor. Although he was on the verge of hyperventilating, it still showered him in relieve that the man in there was still breathing, heart was still beating.

Just then, a long bugbear beep pulled both the doctor and Seongwu's attentions to Jaehwan. The heart beat monitor was indicating that Jaehwan's heart has stopped beating. Doctors frantically rushed into the ward to save Jaehwan but like everyone had already expected, death was determined to bring Jaehwan down with him.

 

 ** _His deathbed_**.

Seongwu was allowed into the ward as the doctors and nurses stepped aside. The annoying beep was no longer there as the machine was removed. Seongwu started crying again as he scrambled towards Jaehwan, hands holding the younger's cold ones as he sobbed.

"Jaehwan. Wake up, this joke is not funny." Jaehwan shook lightly when Seongwu tried to shake him awake. But his eyes remained closed, his chest unmoving, skin cold and turning purple.

"Jaehwannie, don't scare hyung. We promised to be by each other till we're in our 90s. Jaehwannie, I haven't proposed to you and we haven't made it there yet, please wake up." Seongwu buried his face into the younger's cold hand and sobbed, not caring if the nurses next to them started crying too.

"Yah, Kim Jaehwan. Kim Jaehwan, wake up! Why aren't you waking up? Wake up! Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up!!" Just then, a male nurse came in holding a piece of white cloth, the medical staff members turned to nod at each other before the doctor came up to tell Seongwu to step aside.

Seongwu started crying even more, timidly reaching to wipe his own tears as he fought a sob bubbling in his throat. Staring at the now cold body of the love of his life made his heart twist in ways that made him felt like his life just ended with his lover. He smiled as sweetly as possible for one last time to Jaehwan as he slowly let go of the cold hand. He stood up, tears quietly welling up at the rims of his eyes as he left a final peck on his lover's cold and purple lips; lifeless and hard, unlike the soft pink lips that used to mold against his back then. Hesitantly, he backed away.

 

* * *

 

Till today it still hurts Seongwu when he remembers the only person he'd ever loved in his life. The pink ring box still in his hands, the color slightly faded but inside sat one single ring with the word 'Seongwoo's' carved on the inside. Another hole for a ring was present in the box, a ring that said 'Jaehwan's'.

With that ring sitting snugly on his nameless finger, Seongwu places the ring box back in the vanity drawer and walks out of the apartment; the apartment that he'd shared with his late boyfriend, now inhabited by a man with a broken heart.

 

**Author's Note:**

> idk why i even decided to write this i just suddenly came up with the idea and i decided to write. was actually crying myself while writing bc i got too caught up in the emotions seongwu had to portray in the story... ded
> 
> anyways i hope you enjoyed it ! feel free to leave smth here or id k


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